The Kind of Love a Husband should have for his Wife
As a husband, the Christian is to look upon the portrait of Christ Jesus, and he is to paint according to that copy. The true Christian is to be such a husband as Christ was to his church. The love of a husband is special. The Lord Jesus cherishes for the church a peculiar affection, which is set upon her above the rest of mankind: “I pray for them, I pray not for the world.” The elect church is the favourite of heaven, the treasure of Christ, the crown of his head, the bracelet of his arm, the breastplate of his heart, the very centre and core of his love. A husband should love his wife with a constant love, for thus Jesus loves his church. He does not vary in his affection. He may change in his display of affection, but the affection itself is still the same. A husband should love his wife with an enduring love, for nothing “shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” A true husband loves his wife with a hearty love, fervent and intense. It is not mere lip-service. Ah! beloved, what more could Christ have done in proof of his love than he has done? Jesus has a delighted love towards his spouse: He prizes her affection, and delights in her with sweet complacence. Believer, you wonder at Jesus’ love; you admire it—are you imitating it? In your domestic relationships is the rule and measure of your love—“even as Christ loved the church?”
C.H. Spurgeon - Morning and Evening (Evening, March 20th)
Source: joethorn.net
When I have learnt to love God better than my earthly dearest, I shall love my earthly dearest better than I do now.
Insofar as I learn to love my earthly dearest at the expense of God and instead of God, I shall be moving towards the state in which I shall not love my earthly dearest at all.
When first things are put first, second things are not suppressed but increased.
C. S. Lewis, on how to love your spouse without being an idolator.
Cf. Augustine’s Confessions (XI.29):
He loves Thee too little, who loves anything together with Thee, which he loves not for Thy sake.
Source: thegospelcoalition.org
The prospect of a truly great marriage
If two spouses each say, “I’m going to treat my self-centeredness as the main problem in the marriage,” you have the prospect of a truly great marriage.
—Keller, Timothy (2011-11-01). The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God (p. 56). Penguin Group. Kindle Edition.
The alternative to this truce-marriage is to determine to see your own selfishness as a fundamental problem and to treat it more seriously than you do your spouse’s. Why? Only you have complete access to your own selfishness, and only you have complete responsibility for it.
All people need to be treated gently and respectfully, especially those who have been wounded. They will be unusually sensitive to rough handling. Nevertheless, all people must be challenged to see that their self-centeredness hasn’t been caused by the people who hurt them; it’s only been aggravated by the abuse. And they must do something about it, or they’re going to be miserable forever.
A marriage relationship unavoidably entails self-denial, even in the most mundane day-to-day living. It is impossible to have a smooth-running relationship with even one person, let alone two, always feeling that his or her desires should have preeminence because of all he or she has been through in life.
Therefore, when facing any problem in marriage, the first thing you look for at the base of it is, in some measure, self-centeredness and an unwillingness to serve or minister to the other. […] Paul says that this ability to deny your own rights, to serve and put the good of the whole over your own, is not instinctive; indeed, it’s unnatural, but it is the very foundation of marriage.
Keller, Timothy (2011-11-01). The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God (p. 51). Penguin Group. Kindle Edition.
You must be willing to give something up before it can be truly yours. Fulfillment is on the far side of sustained unselfish service, not the near side. It is one of the universal principles of life… (emphasis mine)
Savoring God’s Love for Us
This week I saw a list of answers to this question: What do you regret about this past year? Here are some answers: I regret thinking more money is all I need. I regret believing this would finally be the Cubs’ big year. I regret not spending time with my lonely neighbor. I regret the date nights with my wife I didn’t take. I regret my apathy in worship. I regret being held back by human opinions of me. I regret missing times with God but not missing my show on TV. I regret every minute I gave to pornography. I regret trying to hide my sins from others. I regret the person I’ve become.
I wonder what your regret is. I know mine. But sometimes we don’t see our biggest failing. All the regrets I’ve just read lie at the surface. And there is a deeper reason why we act these ways. The deeper reason is this. We do not savor God’s love for us. Of course, if someone asked us, Does God love you?, we’d all give the right answer. But savoring his love, enjoying his love, drawing strength from his love, especially when we see how sinful we are – that’s different. All our problems stem from this – not believing and receiving the love of God for the undeserving. I am calling you today to enter 2012 with this declaration: “I will let God love me and save me.” There’s a New Year’s Resolution for you! Every day of 2012, rather than try to make God love me, I will let God love me, because he does – for the sake of Christ.
Read the rest here.
Source: dogmadoxa.blogspot.com
A must watch!
Timothy Keller visits Google’s New York, NY office to discuss his book “The Meaning of Marriage.” This event took place on November 14, 2011, as part of the Authors@Google series.
Talk to me about the truth of religion and I’ll listen gladly. Talk to me about the duty of religion and I’ll listen submissively. But don’t come talking to me about the consolation of religion or I shall suspect that you don’t understand.
C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed.
“Jack” (as his friends call Lewis) was devastated by the loss of his wife (Helen Joy) to bone cancer. They married when he was 58; she was 17 years younger than him; they were the best of friends and discovered the beauty of marital love for only 4 years.
A Grief Observed is Lewis’s description of the journey he took after Joy’s death at the age of 45. It’s a portrait of grief and a struggle with his own Christian faith. (Lewis went to be with the Lord only 3 years after Joy).
The end of this quote actually continues:
The conclusion is not “So there’s no God, after all” but “So this is what God is really like, the Cosmic Sadist. The spiteful imbecile?”
Source: pbs.org
